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Post by Tiel on Mar 15, 2018 20:29:13 GMT -5
((Dang I thought this would be longer. Blaaahhh, sorry for the wait! My muse has been fizzling lately and I don't know why, but AAAAAAnyway, poor Yukio and his one weakness: emotions ^O^))
Yukio:
“...some wolves might insist that saying such things would mean you had to share.”
He probably should have expected a response like that. Koa was a clever wolf, he knew that much already, so in hindsight it was rather obvious that she wouldn't fall into his verbal trap so easily. But the way her tail swayed curiously… and her eyes followed him expectantly… maybe she really was trapped. Of course she was. Yukio still had it, even around Koa, who had managed to swerve around the majority of his mind games thus far. Though it was not like Koa had any obligation to avoid this one. He was sharing a secret, as Koa had been requesting of him continuously.
Yukio stopped walking. His gaze locked with hers. He felt her body heat radiating from her pelt, and between his damp paws and the breeze running its icy tendrils through his fur, all he wanted to do was draw closer. But he stayed where he was, smiling, eyes bright and wistful.
Now came the hard part. Telling her. Yukio was careful with his words in any case, but these particular circumstances seemed to require some extra calculation. No more games, although he was vaguely tempted to make it into something like a game. Except, that never went well.
If there was one thing Yukio struggled with, it was emotions — entirely serious, entirely real emotions. Or maybe just emotional situations. Yukio played with emotions, others’ and his own. He tore little nicks into the hearts of unsuspecting wolves, reached his paws in, and felt around to see what was there. A single conversation with Yukio in the morning led to panicked introspection at night, the nicks he had left growing into deep chasms. The funny thing was Yukio never dug the chasms himself, he got wolves to dig their own chasms, and he watched on with personal, unspoken satisfaction.
Now, beneath the redwood canopy, side-by-side with Koa, Yukio was digging his own chasm. He was sauntering into a trap he had set for himself and he had nowhere to turn. He couldn't crack a joke, he couldn't start up a debate, he had to give nothing but truth.
What to say, what to say. Maybe he could manage to sum it all up in one sentence. Or maybe he'd have to make a speech. What would a romantic say?
“I think you're beautiful.”
No. It wasn't that he didn't believe she was beautiful, it was just that Yukio had met a lot of plain yet beautiful wolves before. Koa was something entirely different. She was a rare creature Yukio was falling in love with.
Falling in love with! Was he really in love? Yukio examined himself, his feelings for Koa, feelings he had never felt before. Koa. Love. The words felt natural enough. Yukio was in love. Power. Yukio was in love. All right, then. Where was he? “I think you're beautiful.” “I think your mind is beautiful.”
Yukio’s stance changed subtly. His chin lowered, his green eyes softened, his smile turned delicate and hungry. His tail stopped wagging.
“Koa,” he said, voice low but still full of meaning and purpose. “I think your mind is beautiful.”
At this point, he did not blush or glance off or wince. His gaze met her minty eyes and stayed there patiently, meaning what he said.
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Post by Meds on Mar 16, 2018 10:49:38 GMT -5
Koa;
Yukio stopped walking, and because Koa had been watching him so intently, she stopped at almost the same moment. Her eyes dug into his own, but there was a cloud there, as if he was so deep within his powerful mind that he was no longer present; and yet he was. Koa watched on in acute fascination, waiting to see what the self professed-conversationalist would come up with after her not-so-subtle prompting. Koa was imagining Yukio trying to come up with a way to best tell her the way he had killed somebody, or perhaps the number of wolves he had killed, or something along those lines. Secret, to Koa, often meant that which should not be said—or that should not be owned up to. That was why she didn't have many secrets herself, as Koa always (or at least always tried) to own up to her own issues. But suddenly Yukio resurfaced, and looked her up and down, moving closer. It was in that moment that Koa felt the first tingling-sensation of doubt. Secret, she now supposed, could mean any number of things. What sort of secret was Yukio preparing himself to tell her?
"I think your mind is beautiful."
That caught Koa off-guard a little bit. She hid it in the large-portion of her face well, but her eyes widened ever so slightly before she got control of them, too. Cryptic, yes—but also plain and straight to the point. He thought her mind was beautiful. Now Koa faced the daunting task of picking apart what he meant. On the one hand, they had been having a reasonably intense conversation, and both had so far commented on the fact that having another to converse with in such a way was enjoyable. Yukio could have meant it in this way, still playing around (or attempting to) with her mind, giving her a not-so-secret secret, in that he was merely saying something explicitly instead of implicitly. Then again, on the other hand... Secrets could mean any number of things, as Koa had just imagined. And suddenly, Yukio didn't seem the kind of wolf that would truly, truly value surface beauty. In that respect, then, could Koa take his meaning as that she was beautiful? Not just in her mind, but her soul, her personality, her take on the world? Yukio was nothing if not intensely calculating, and Koa found herself leaning towards the more in-depth synopsis of meaning.
But now what to say? She had managed to keep her face as calm as possible, though her eyes might have reflected a bit of her thoughts. Subtle confusion at first, slight worry in having to figure out what he meant—a light crinkling at the idea of him finding her, in full, beautiful. But what to say? She had no definitive proof that Yukio had meant it in a romantic sort of way—but looking closer now, the intensity of his stare made her guess nothing else. But did she feel that in return? The quick answer was no, though she had enjoyed flirting with him and joking around... but love? He was such an in-depth creature that Koa felt she barely knew him yet. She didn't know, honestly, what the answer to her own question was. She could see it, them being together, if she thought hard; then again, however, she also saw herself alone, heading off a pack and focusing on that which made her stronger. But what to say?
"You've caught me off-guard, Yukio," She said, feeling a natural smile come to her face and eyes. There was no sense lying to him. He was too clever for that and could probably already tell—perhaps he had even intended it, a little bit. "How's a girl supposed to respond to a wolf like you... telling her something like that?" Her words were not harsh. They were gentle, subtly playful, because the reality was that Koa didn't know how she felt. She was also confident that Yukio was intelligent enough to not be hurt or shut her out for her honesty. She allowed the smile to remain on her face, then decided to make her guess explicit. "I will admit, though... that such things do paint a rather pretty picture."
((squee ^^ So yea, we don't have to keep this going for much longer if we want to move on to IW's territory—I just thought this was the most honest reply for Koa to give, as she wouldn't know. She's not OPPOSED, and she's also not sure. I see a fun future for these two!!))
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Post by Tiel on Mar 17, 2018 23:23:01 GMT -5
Yukio:
The anticipation was awful, which was why it was wonderful. Koa’s face was difficult to interpret, probably because she was trying to hide what she was feeling. Why would she have something to hide? Maybe she didn't feel the same way. Maybe she did feel the same way, and she was embarrassed because of it. Yukio’s stomach was in a knot, an exhilaration he had not felt in a while. It was hard to shake Yukio, leaving him in a dull world where a good fright was hard to come by, but this moment, awaiting a response that decided everything, was bone chilling. He felt alive — perilously alive.
Koa smiled. Then she said something surprisingly honest. He wouldn't have expected Koa to admit that she had been caught off guard, and truly, Yukio wasn't sure how to feel about the response. Most of the time, he liked to surprise, but he wondered if there had been a different way to go about it than to baffle her. Perhaps he should've taken it slowly.
But that smile. It lit something up in Yukio, a glimmer of hope, a tiny inferno at this notion: he had flattered her.
“How's a girl supposed to respond to a wolf like you... telling her something like that?”
Yukio more than matched her smile. Ten Koa smiles could fit into the smile he was wearing. Now he stepped closer to her, caught up in the delight of the moment, and his eyes came inches away from hers as she continued, “I will admit, though... that such things do paint a rather pretty picture.”
A thrill surged through him from his nose to his tail, which was doing its own wild dance that Yukio didn't even bother trying to suppress. His heart fluttered, and he just wasn't in the mood to hide how he felt. A deep, merry laugh rose from the back of his throat, joyful and triumphant, but it came out softer than the average Yukio laugh. His eyes squinted as he let the chuckle overcome him.
He hadn't expected to be so delighted, and the truth was, Koa hadn't even said something extremely profound. She could picture them together, so could he. It wasn't over. Picturing and wanting were two different things. He let out a breath and pulled himself together.
“I would,” he began warmly. “be honored to get to know you better.” He inhaled softly, knowing that his words could be interpreted in a variety of ways. But he didn't doubt Koa would misunderstand. Yukio wanted to get to know her in a way beyond friendship.
((We don't have to rush to finish this thread and move on to the other one, I like the pace it's going at right now. But yes, I agree, I'm excited to see where their relationship goes. ^u^ ))
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Post by Meds on Mar 26, 2018 11:38:58 GMT -5
Koa;
A smile the likes of which Koa didn't even know a wolf like Yukio was capable of doing, suddenly lit up his face in response to her own smile. It was this, more than anything else, that lead Koa to believe that her guess of Yukio's meaning was correct. A deep laugh echoed from his mouth, but it was cut short and surprisingly soft. Koa didn't know what she had been expecting, because Yukio hadn't exactly guffawed yet, but such a quiet and collected laugh seemed somehow not to match the rest of the situation. Another smile, different this time, traced her own lips once more. He then spoke the words that made Koa know, beyond a reasonable doubt, that Yukio felt something for her. Fallen for her? Ah, she was not so sure about that. A wolf like Yukio, so involved in teases and arguing—she imagined that in fleeting moments he could feel such things as love... but long-term? Her thoughts didn't show on her face, she wasn't so open as that, but she did wonder in that moment.
If she was right, and she was sure she was, she could picture them together—she hadn't been untruthful. But how long would such a thing last? How long could it last? Koa had known Yukio for all of a single day, and already she got the sense from him that he was not the type of wolf to be held down; in fact, she was quite surprised that he was allowing himself to think anything else. Her eyes narrowed slightly, playful, and she looked him up and down. She knew not to be too playful, else risk pushing Yukio away. She didn't want to push him away; indeed, she didn't know where she wanted this to go. But she knew she wasn't quite as all-in as he seemed to be... But how to play it up in a way that showed she was not decided either way, possibly willing to be swayed, but also one-hundred percent certain that she enjoyed his company and had an interest in continuing contact?
"A wolf like you?" Her eyes shifted, the mint darkening for a moment and allowing the somewhat-mischievous grin to become highlighted on her face. "Wanting to get to know me, better?" Her tail swayed, not-quite matching the speed of his own. "Surely you know a wolf like me, is far too clever, to take a wolf like you on his word the very first time he brings it up?"
She desperately hoped that was good enough. It was true, all of it. It was her thoughts laid out plainly for him to see, though dampened slightly so as not to hurt him. Koa watched for a reaction, aware he could take it either way, but hoping he would take it well.
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Post by Tiel on Apr 3, 2018 16:14:55 GMT -5
((Ok, so, Yukio in love is really hard to play. But I guess I'm the one who wanted to test his limits and throw him into uncomfortable situations. Also, I'm REALLY sorry about how late this is. I was procrastinating too much. ))
Yukio:
He was thinking that perhaps it would've been a wiser decision to suppress that laugh, but then Koa cracked a smile. It was a smile he hadn't yet seen, and he was unsure if it was joyful or mischievous, or even both, but he found he liked the smile, whatever it meant. She could've been smiling at how foolish his laugh was, or she could've been smiling because she, too, felt some mysterious joy. He latched onto the smile, and thought not about what it might signify, but only the notion that there was something that had amused her and now she was smiling.
When Yukio was done speaking, Koa’s eyes darkened and her smile changed subtly, or maybe it was just brighter than before. Either way, it made him realize it was a playful expression, and he wondered if that was a good thing or a bad thing. At least she wasn't uncomfortable, or so he hoped.
“A wolf like you?” she began lightly, but he could almost detect some uncertainty in her voice. She sounded casual, but she was thinking hard about her words. “Wanting to get to know me, better?”
His smile faded ever so slightly, more in thought than disappointment since he genuinely had no clue where she was going with this. Then Koa finished, “Surely you know a wolf like me is far too clever to take a wolf like you on his word the very first time he brings it up?”
Yukio sighed, but not dismally. “What reason do you have to trust me, really?” He didn't expect an answer, though he said it like it wasn't rhetorical. He said it like it was a challenge. It was pensive, and a long train of thought followed. He hadn't given Koa any reason to trust him yet, so why should she believe his feelings were real? No. They were real and he didn't doubt that she knew it. But would they last? That was the question. He himself wasn't even sure yet. What if this wasn't love, but infatuation? What if Yukio was only deeply infatuated with Koa’s remarkable spiderweb of a mind? Except, there was something different about his feelings for Koa than for any other wolf that had come before, and he couldn't deny that fact. He knew they had a chance, more than that, but he had to prove himself to Koa. How, though?
Maybe the best way was just to open himself up to her. Not that Yukio had been dishonest, but he had sure been deliberate about every move he had made. Now he would show her a glimpse of his raw self, who he was when he was not putting on a show.
The facade fell. His stance changed to something humble, his nose pointing down but his eyes still meeting hers. It was just a small glimpse of who he was inwardly, and he expected she wouldn’t take its meaning lightly. It was a gift. An offering. A request.
“You know,” he began, voice steady. “When we talk, I feel more alive than I have felt in a long time.” A gentle smile tugged at his lips. “I want to give us a chance, if you're willing. Just give me a chance.”
He waited a small moment before he let the smile spread wide and the facade return, postured and energized. He put on his expectant face, expectant of a response. He could wait, if that was what it came down to, but he would not give up. That was simply not something Yukio did.
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Post by Meds on Apr 12, 2018 21:39:23 GMT -5
Koa;
"What reason do you have to trust me, really?"
Koa watched him with calculating eyes, allowing her smile to remain. He was smart, agreeing and yet not agreeing. Even by mentioning such a thing, it was as if he was tempting her. Letting her see into the depths of his mind. There was no reason to trust him, but there also was no reason not to trust him. So why not? Koa could just imagine thoughts just like that ticking through his brain, one by one. Her smile widened slightly, turning more smirk-like. Why not indeed?
"Indeed. Then again, do I have a reason not to?" She voiced, making her question known. Surely he would appreciate the way her mind had processed his sentence. That was Yukio, Koa knew—appreciative of deep-thinking, no matter what it involved.
Suddenly then, Yukio's entire demeanor changed. Koa stilled her steps, though not so abruptly as to make it seem awkward. She watched him, her chin tilting towards him even as his own chin angled towards the ground, his eyes meeting hers. Suddenly, it was as if she was seeing him for the first time—not the wolf she had thought she had figured out. Not the wolf he tried so desperately to be. But truly, Yukio. Koa wasn't quite sure how to respond. It was such a switch that it was almost down-right shocking, and his words suddenly rang so pure and true that Koa had to be sure she had heard correctly. He was speaking his heart to her, so it would seem. Koa blinked slowly, taking the information in and digesting it slowly.
"A chance..." She mused, tasting the idea, hearing how it sounded when ringing through her mind. She mulled it over for a good long while, one ear flicking towards her friend. Indeed, Yukio had become a friend. A wolf she could see herself looking to throughout the future. But would that be enough for him? More so... would it be enough for her? She was not interested in a mate at the time... besides, she had larger things to think about with her quickly-forming pack ideas... But if she locked Yukio out of her heart for good... would she regret it? Her mint-eyes found him again.
"I'm not a wolf to be held down, Yukio." Her eyes appraised him. "I wouldn't think you would be, either. Can you truly, honestly, see that? Yes, I've made you think. We've had a good conversation... but what exactly do you think you're looking for? A mate? A life-long commitment to the same female, day in and day out?" She smirked once more. "I think even my shocking intellect would eventually bore you. Be honest with yourself, Yukio. We barely know each other—what if I am not what you think I am?" She shook her head. "This is not to shut you out entirely. As I said before... it is a rather pretty picture. But I'm smart first, Yukio. Though I don't know you well—I think I know you well enough. You are not a male to take a fancy and hold it for long. Am I wrong? Correct me if so." Her tail flicked, and she moved forward to brush her nose against the fur on the side of his neck. He smelled quite nice, though Koa tried to ignore it. "This isn't a no-for-good. It's a no-for-now. Let's let our relationship blossom first. Friends, associates, conversation-partners. Why complicate it further?" She sighed, removing her nose from his fur and leaning back.
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Post by Tiel on Apr 28, 2018 9:44:58 GMT -5
Yukio:
Koa smirked at his question of trust, a curious expression. Then she said, “Indeed. Then again, do I have a reason not to?”
There was an air about her, and Yukio was suddenly aware she was proud of this question. Yukio let the words roll over in his mind, allowing his head to tilt back and forth as he thought. He finally settled to say, “It is fortunate no one can prove a negative.”
Koa’s suggestion was of a flimsy logic, the idea that she should trust him simply because he hadn't yet offered a reason not to. Then again, wasn't that how most wolves began to trust each other? Hoping the other wouldn't break their promises merely because they haven't ever before? It was a strange nature, and Yukio was tempted to label it a weakness. Surely Koa, almost as clever as himself, realized how tenuous her point was. So why make it? There was a faint glimmer in the back of Yukio’s brain — gut — heart? — that felt inclined to settle for the answer, Because she wants to trust you!
Yukio let his smile grow faintly. He watched Koa’s expression change at the same time Yukio’s demeanor did, and he knew at that moment that she took the glimpse he offered for exactly what it was. He could see her eyes, as they widened in surprise, catch the light that fell through the canopy — so many dazzling variations of the same light green…
“A chance…” she pondered aloud. Yukio nodded, his facade at this point back to its usual forced charisma, but he allowed his eyes to reflect the pensive twinkle hers held. Koa’s buzzing thought process was manifested in her expression. What Yukio would give to know exactly what was going on in her brain at that moment.
“I'm not a wolf to be held down, Yukio. I wouldn't think you would be, either.” Somehow, this answer did not surprise him. Maybe he had always been expecting it in the back of his mind. But his disappointment was still plain. “What if I am not what you think I am?”
The thing was, Yukio believed firmly that Koa was exactly what he thought she was, but once again, Yukio himself had been withholding his true self from her this entire time. It would simply be hypocritical to expect her to open up to him. He would not ask Koa to pull trust out of thin air.
“You are not a male to take a fancy and hold it for long. Am I wrong? Correct me if so.” Yukio did not correct her. “This isn't a no-for-good,” she continued, now closer to him, her nose brushing against his fur. Yukio knew he was only imagining the longing behind the gesture, so he tried not to think about it. “It's a no-for-now. Let's let our relationship blossom first. Friends, associates, conversation-partners. Why complicate it further?”
“No-for-now,” he repeated, his voice not quite gloomy. She was giving him what he had requested: a chance. She wasn't jumping into anything, but she was not shutting him out. That was enough. Yukio didn't want to wait, but he was more than willing to. He offered a delicate smile. “I can't say I'm not disappointed… but I respect you, Koa, and I respect your wishes.”
Yukio sighed then, and his gaze went to the horizon. By now, they were in the shadow of the mountains and the sky was beginning to darken. Time had flown by during their conversation. He didn't want to part ways with her, but he needed to find a place to stay for the night, and after what went on this evening, there was no way they were going to spend the night in the same den. Yukio fixed Koa with a sorrowful look, hoping she'd catch its meaning. The day was almost over and it was time to part. “I hope to see you again, friend-associate-conversation-partner.”
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Post by Meds on May 1, 2018 15:57:38 GMT -5
Koa;
Well, blast it all. If it hadn't been so unfortunate, it would have been almost comical. The light in Yukio's eyes died so quickly after Koa had finished speaking, that it was as if she had flicked a switch. She hadn't wanted to hurt him. Indeed, the fluttering feelings she had gotten in her stomach when he had continually stepped in front of her and fixed her with those penetrating eyes couldn't be ignored. Koa wasn't one to second-guess herself, but this time around she half-wondered if she couldn't have been a little bit more delicate. She hadn't thought Yukio would develop—whatever this was—so quickly. He just hadn't struck her as the type. Had she known just how... serious he was about the whole thing, she might have skirted around the exact details a little bit more. He repeated her words, as if making sure he had heard them just right and wasn't missing his chance. He was definitely crest-fallen, Koa could easily see that, but he also seemed reasonably hopeful. After all, he should be. Koa was by no means opposed to what he was suggesting. A pretty picture indeed...
"Well I trust that your respect is something hard-earned, and even harder-lost, Yukio." Her eyes danced as she spoke. Even the way his name felt on her tongue when speaking seemed, if not right, then familiar. His eyes then lifted to the heavens, no odubt noticing how quickly the sun had seemed to descend. Koa realized that it was indeed getting late, and the two of them couldn't well share a den together. It surprised her that for a moment, it had seemed like the next logical direction of the interaction; to find a warm—and private—little spot to spend the night. She blinked as she realized that, no, that was not the next logical step. How curious that she had been subconsciously assuming such a thing until that moment. "And I you, Yukio. I trust we will meet again."
She turned her shoulder then, cast one last glance at him, then trotted off into the dimming light. -Exit Koa-
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Post by Tiel on May 16, 2018 21:44:13 GMT -5
Yukio:
“Well I trust that your respect is something hard-earned, and even harder-lost, Yukio.”
Yukio nodded. Those words rang with truth. Koa would not soon lose his respect, nor would she soon be forgotten. Somehow, Yukio just knew that from now on, nothing would be the same.
They exchanged goodbyes. Here was something Koa apparently trusted: that they would meet again. Yukio was simply not comfortable leaving it to fate. He would come find her again, no matter what the circumstances.
He made a vow then, silently, standing there amidst the redwoods, watching Koa’s blue form disappear, that this would not be the last time they would see each other. Maybe it wouldn't work out. Maybe she would find a handsome he wolf or he a lovely she wolf and they'd settle down. Maybe they wouldn't even be friends. Maybe it would be too awkward. Nonetheless, Yukio would find her again. For he was certain, if he never saw her again, he would never stop thinking about her.
Yukio stood there long after Koa was out of his line of vision, staring indecisively out at the distant trees. Dusk birds began to sing and tweet, and an owl’s hoot sent Yukio back to the present. What was he doing? He had to find somewhere to spend the night. It was back to the same boring, everyday life. But it wasn't. He could dress it up on the surface all he wanted, yet he knew everyday life would never be the same again. Everything was different now. Yukio had found a new equilibrium, and he certainly didn't plan on ever returning to the old one.
— Exit Yukio
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