[Tagged] Wake-Up Call

[Karmatose]

It hadn't been very long since the pair found shelter under a mostly-intact structure of one of the strange ruins surrounding them. The east-facing wall had collapsed into a pile of moss-covered bricks, creating a perfect view of the rising sun when it came, and there was the occasional hole in the ceiling, but otherwise, it was a good shelter. It would keep them warm and dry, at least.

Shortly after arrival, Allura — as he had discovered her name was on the way there — had fallen asleep curled into his side. He told himself it was an annoyance, having her so close to him even in sleep...but he didn't want to admit how he really felt. He huffed slightly, laying his head on his paws. He knew already he'd have trouble drifting off tonight; he had too much to think about. He briefly considers trying to run off while she's asleep, but dismisses it quickly. After all, he doubted he could move much without waking her, as close as they were.

He thought about his old pack, something he'd refused to let himself dwell on for too long before. Now, the thoughts came unbidden, and he couldn't hold back the small whimper that escaped his throat. He thought about his parents and siblings; his friends and aunts and uncles. He remembered playing in these very ruins, but this time the memory was stained with something bitter. He swallowed hard and forced his mind to clear, and he was asleep before he knew what hit him.

---

Fire burned through his legs as he raced through the snow, cold wind slapping against his face and leaving ice in his fur. He could barely see more than a few feet in front of his nose through the thick of the blizzard, but he didn't need to see to know they were behind him. He could hear their howls as they signaled to the other packs that they'd found their prey — him. The only time all the packs ever seemed to get along...The Hunt was a dangerous time for any lone wolf, indeed. He knew leaving the safety of his bunker was a bad idea, but he was running low on food, and the weather had seemed clear enough when he left. It had turned in an instant, and now he was about to pay for his mistake.

But he didn't have time to think about that now. He'd been singled out, which meant that the only thing he could think about right now was running. And so he ran, unsure of what lay before him. It didn't matter — all that mattered is what lay behind him. He barely registered a stain of crimson in the corner of his vision, and he realized he must have just passed another victim of The Hunt. He didn't have time for pity — that wolf would have killed him if he'd gotten the chance. He heard the howls pressing closer, their voices carried off in the wind but still so audible it was deafening. He felt teeth graze his hip, snatching fur but not much else, and he didn't dare let himself look back, because he had to run before —

---

He woke up with a start, gasping for air as he stood up so fast the movement made him dizzy, disorientated and confused. Where was he? He peered through the darkness to find another pair of eyes peering back at him, and a sudden terror etched its way into his face before everything from last night came rushing back, and he swayed on his paws, feeling lightheaded.

@teegan

[Deleted]

Allura was happy with the shelter they’d found. They were rather lucky to find a place for the night that would accommodate them both and keep them dry and warm till morning. She didn’t trust that cranky was going to actually stay if she fell asleep. So she faked being tired and curled into his side. She made sure to take long even deep breaths to make it seem like she’d fallen into a deep peaceful sleep. She would occasionally wiggle into him enjoying the heat and adding to her facade.

She was greatly that he didn’t try to leave and make her track his ass down and beat him up. So she laid there and let him brood in his thoughts. She felt her heart clench when his whine reached her ears. And it took everything in her not to say something to him. Instead she wiggles into him again as she’d done before. Soon after she felt his body relax and his breathing slow. She knew he was asleep so she opened her eyes and looked him over. His recovery was going to be hard on him. But she had made up her mind. Plus after being alone for so long she was enjoying the company. She leaned up and licked his muzzle. “I’m sorry for your loss” she whispered before nuzzling into his neck and this time falling asleep for real.

Allura was jolted awake as Marsh gasped for air. In a sleepy dazed state she sat up thinking they were being attacked and whipped her head around only to be met with nothing. Her heart hammered in her chest as she watched him. They made eye contact and she stood up and slowly moved toward him and pressed herself against his side. “Shhhh it’s okay marsh. It’s okay. It was only a nightmare. Shhh you’re safe. You’re safe. Lay back down. It’s okay” she urged him, licking his cheek over and over again.

Karmatose

[Karmatose]

Marsh recoiled as she attempted to press against him, feeling insecure and hardly wanting to be touched. He let out a low growl, but his heart wasn't in it, and he moved away as she tried to lick his cheek. He wanted a moment to himself, but he didn't know how to get that with over-affectionate crazy nearby. So, he did the only thing he knew how to do.

He ran.

He pushed past her and darted out of the shelter into the dead of night, his paws making heavy prints in the soft ground as he sprinted through the trees. He didn't stop until he'd practically collapsed, the sound of crickets the only thing around him as he finally gave himself a break. He spent several minutes catching his breath before the regret hit him.

He tried not to acknowledge the regret, instead turning to his other turbulent emotions — mostly fear. What was he so afraid of? Why did he feel so afraid of this she-wolf when she was practically the only one in his life who hasn't meant him harm? Why doesn't he want to let her in?

Deciding he doesn't like the answer to those questions, either, he lets his mind go blank as he focuses on his breathing and the crickets. Eventually, his thoughts turn to his safety — it wasn't like him to leave the safety of shelter in unfamiliar territory without being properly prepared. He needed to go back if only to ensure his safety. He told himself that's all it was.

Thankfully, he knew better than he did when he was younger, otherwise, he likely would've gotten lost again. He followed the tracks he'd left back towards the shelter, feeling no better than he had when he'd left.

@teegan

[Deleted]

The first hurt he caused was recoiling from her and then he’d growled at her. She’s thought they’d been making some progress already. Especially after he’s stayed when he’d thought she was asleep. But she was wrong. And she couldn’t understand why that hurt her so much. After all they’d just met. Maybe it was because she felt responsible for him after telling him about his family. Yeah. That was it she thought. But then he did something unforgivable.

He ran.

She watched dumb struck as he pushed past her and ran. Thoughts of her family started to pop up but she refused to let them in right now. He’d ran from her, pushed past her like she hadn’t been there for him. She stepped outside and watched his frame shrinking in the distance and darkness. She frowned. The pain making tears well up in her eyes. She scratched her muzzle with her paw and huffed.

She turned and stepped back inside the den. If he wanted to run from her like that. Fine. He was no better than her family. She curled up in a ball and watched the entrance. Part of her wishing he’d come back. And the rest of her daring him to come back so she could beat some sense into his stupid cranky ass. She frowned.

She wasn’t sure what was about to happen but the moment he came back her head snapped up and then she stood up And turned around so she couldn’t see his stupid face. All that hurt and anger came back and she didn’t even want to look at him. So I’m the end he’d dared come back. Apparently her really did need her. Why else would he come back.

Karmatose

[Karmatose]

Marsh frowned as he watched her turn away, confused for a moment before realizing suddenly exactly what he'd done wrong — he'd taken advantage of her kindness. It was such a stupid mistake, given that kindness was so rare in this world, and he of all wolves should know that. Even still, he'd done it. He approached cautiously, trying to word something like an apology, but he didn't know what to say. Somehow, he got a sinking feeling in his gut that she wouldn't reply even if he did apologize. Unsure what to do, but not willing to leave yet, he slunk past her and towards the darkest corner of their shelter, settling in with his nose pressed against the wall. It was a long moment before he spoke again, but even then he didn't move an inch, still facing the wall. He didn't want her to see the pain in his eyes. He didn't understand why her feelings mattered so much to him.

"I'm sorry..." he started cautiously, and there was a short pause before he proceeded, "I...I'm not familiar with...With other wolves, I suppose. No one..." His voice cracked a little, and he struggled to keep it steady as memories threatened to rush him. "...No one has....touched me...in a long time. So...I-I...I'm scared. Okay?" His voice grew a little defensive at the end, but the whole speech was so broken it would likely be hard to blame him. There was a long pause before eventually, he added, "I...I just needed space. Something more...more familiar, I guess..." His voice trailed off, and he seemed like he wanted to say more, but he ended up quieting, turning his head slightly to watch her back. His eyes were glossy with fear and vulnerability — two of his least favorite emotions. He felt tempted to turn away again, but he refused to give in to that urge. He wasn't one to make the same mistake twice.

@teegan

[Deleted]

She felt him approach her but she closed her eyes and wished him away. She had nothing to say to him. She waited till he’d walked away from her to relax a bit. She refused to look at him and let him see the pain he’d inflicted upon her. She refused to show him weakness like that. She hated being weak. And in that moment she hated him for making her feel that way. He was a stranger. And his actions shouldn’t hurt that way. She didn’t know him. She didn’t care for him. That’s why it was all the more frustrating for her that she was reacting this way to his actions.

“Why are you apologizing to me. I’m just here to make sure your cranky ass can survive when I leave. I don’t know you. And you clearly don’t know me.” She huffed. Still not looking at him. “You should be scared. If I hadn’t happened across you you may have found someone who wasn’t raised to a good aligned family. Who would have sooner killed you than helped you. I’m putting my neck out for you. Because I’ve done just fine on my own. Careful even. And you could slow me down. You’re scared? What about me ? Do you not get that I’m in danger all the time here too. And now I’m helping you. Staying in on place. Hunting for you, smelling like you. Trying to help you?!?” She snapped her voice shaking. She stood up abruptly still keeping her eyes off his face. “More familiar? You want familiar. and I want to make sure you can live. So I guess you’re shit out of luck today cranky. Because you’re about to be put through the fucking ringer. You’re not alone. Your not in a familiar place nor location and it’s time you manned up and accepted that! Before you get us both killed. Anyone could have caught you out there and followed your scent back to me. You don’t smell of this area yet. That’s risk alone. “ she snapped again before taking off out of the den and into the night. She needed to calm down and breathe. She needed to take her anger out on something. She needed to hunt.

Karmatose

[Karmatose]

Marsh watched as she fled into the dark, staring wide-eyed at her after-image. He wasn't sure whether to follow her or not, so he aired on the side of caution and stayed put. He told himself he didn't care if she left, that he was better off without her...but he couldn't convince himself of those lies this time. Eventually, he told himself the truth for perhaps the first time since he'd met her — he wasn't alright, and he certainly wasn't alright without her. He needed help. And suddenly, a rush of emotion threatened to overtake him, and he felt flashback after flashback run through his head, feeling like the world was on fire.

---

He heard pawsteps above him, the movement shaking loose dirt from the ceiling of the shallowly dug burrow down onto his nose. Ice flooded his veins, terror seeping into his very being as he resisted the urge to sneeze. He willed the wolf above him to simply pass over his hidden burrow, to not notice his scent or the way the snow was slightly less thick around the entrance. He hoped he had succeeded in disguising the scent of his food pile — eating prey covered in deer droppings was hardly ideal, but it kept him alive. Rule Numero Uno for any lone wolf during The Hunt...You didn't move an inch until it was over. You hid and you waited. Anything else was certain to get you killed.

The pawsteps passed, but he didn't let himself breathe for several minutes after, finally beginning to relax before suddenly he heard a snarl above him, and he knew then that he was going to die and hedidn'twanttodieohgodno but then he heard a pained yelp, and something fell to the ground with a hard thud just above his head. More snarls and he realized that there was a fight going on right above his head. He resisted the urge to whine as he heard the sickening crunch of a crushed trachea — the sound would forever haunt him — and another thud above him. He listened in terror as a howl cut through the air and the rest of the pack arrived to feed. By the time they left, it wasn't dirt that fell on his nose but blood as it seeped through the ground.

The sounds of bones crunching would never leave his head.

---

He didn't realize he had begun whimpering until it was too late to stop it, his eyes covered with his paws as he faced the wall, twitching slightly as memories came without permission or warning. His whimpers filled the empty space of their shelter, and he didn't realize it but he was muttering to himself, completely consumed in his thoughts. His murmurs came across broken and garbled, but a few words could still be distinguished from the broken fragments of sentence structure. "...scent... alive... didn't... move... killed... pawsteps... want... die... yelp... fight... trachea... terror... feed... blood... bones..."

[Deleted]

Allura didn’t look back as she left. She needed to find something to kill, anything that would serve as food and stress release. She slowed her pace to a gentle walk, nose twitching as she searched for any tiny scent trail she could find. Her ears were perked as she kept an ear out for anything - prey or enemy. She was always this cautious and even more so now that she had Marsh to help look after. She couldn’t risk a fight or death because that would leave marsh alone. Not that she should care. But she did. As she moved on, finally she caught a scent, a good scent, Food. She perked up quickly her gloomy mood dimmed just a bit. Rabbit- they were quick little creatures. But she wasn’t to worried about it. With a quiet step she began to track the owner of the scent. Within minutes she’d found the hole. Carefully she marked the spot and began to look for the exit hole. Sniffing around she found it next to a tree almost a whole seven feet from the entrance. She quickly began to fill the hole, flinging dirt into it, then pressing it with her paws to pack it in and continuing until she had successfully managed to block their exit. Gleefully she moved back toward the front and began to snarl. She stopped and listened. SHe knew they were moving now, she could hear them. Quickly covering the entrance with dirt she began to dig above the tunnel she thought was beneath her. She ended up digging in a few spots until it caved in. there she found two adult rabbits and a handful of small babies. Striking quick, she locked her jaws on the closest adult rabbit’s head and crunched down.

Allura felt so much better after her successful hunt. Her hurt was better. Carrying the dead rabbit in her jaw she made her way back. Stepping into the den she tossed the rabbit to marsh. Before she noticed the words. “Marsh?” She practically whispered at him. She’d never seen him act like that. Even when she was fake sleeping. She got on her belly and crawled closer slowly. And whines softly trying to get his attention. Nosing his paw and looking up at him. “Marsh?!” She called out again

Karmatose

[Karmatose]

Long after the sounds of crunching bones had left, Marsh lay perfectly still in his den, refusing to move even as blood from above soaked his fur. He listened carefully, his heart racing at a mile a minute, and he was met with only silence. Even still, the quiet didn't comfort him. He was too terrified to move — What if they came back? He refused to end up like the corpse above his head, ravaged by his own kind.

"Marsh?" His blood turned to ice as he heard the whisper, barely inches away from him. Was it behind him? How-? Slowly, he turned his head to look behind him, certain that these would be his last moments.

There was nothing there.

"Marsh?!"

He snapped back into reality with a physical jolt, heart pounding and paws sweating. He glanced around frantically, his eyes gleaming with terror so much more visible than when he'd had that nightmare in the darkness of night. He physically jumped as he spotted Allura, a wild look entering his eyes, like that of a cornered animal. He backed away in a rush, driving his back against the wall of the shelter before recognition showed in his gaze, though not enough to hide the fear in his expression. He was breathing heavily, and even though he recognized her he didn't relax, his gaze flitting to the rabbit on the floor before moving back towards her. He stared at her paws, not her face — something he'd learned long ago. He'd learned his lesson. He'd never get distracted by a wolf's expression again. It had almost cost him his life last time.

A flashback rushed through his head again, and he staggered, although it wasn't nearly as vivid as before. He tried to re-focus, to ignore the ice in his veins and the tears staining tracks down his face. He opened his mouth, his throat feeling incredibly dry as he closed it again to swallow the lump in his throat. He tried to say something, but it came out as a pathetic croak that he was ashamed to admit came from him. He didn't bother trying again, instead making an effort to maintain his breathing even as he stared at her paws as if his life depended on it. If she moved her paws even a single inch, he wasn't quite sure what he'd do — but it'd be bad. Right now, his sanity depended on her distance, and he hoped that much was clear just from the look on his face.

@teegan

[Deleted]

Allura has never seen him or anyone else act in such a manner. It scared her a bit. She stayed glued where she was. She wasn’t sure what to do in that type of incident. Her eyes were big with fear and concern as she watched marsh. “Marsh?” She whisper talked. “Marsh it’s me Allura…. I brought you a rabbit..” she nodded towards the rabbit. “Marsh talk to me please” she practically begged. It was an odd feeling for her. Begging. But that didn’t stop her. She remained completely still. Not moving and waiting. It’s all she could do.

.Allura watched the tears roll down his face and felt her heart clench. She wanted to lick them away and comfort him but she was still glued to her spot. All she could do was watch. She felt like there was this heavy weight holding her down. She did something new though. She began to sing for him. Hoping that it would help them both. She closed her eyes and laid her head on her paws keeping the song up. She sang of happy things and times. She sang of memories with her twin. A song that brought tears to her eyes as the memories danced through her mind.

Karmatose

[Karmatose]

Marsh saw the fear in her eyes and a flicker of memory rolled behind his eyes, this time of a different kind.

---

The pup stared at him with fear in his young, impressionable eyes, eyeing the blood dripping from his teeth. Marsh didn't know whether he was supposed to feel regret now that he knew he'd killed a mother; the survival instinct blocked that sort of emotion out. He let the beating of his heart calm after the rush of a fight, huffing at the pup, "You — Do you have any siblings?"

He wasn't quite sure why he asked, but the youngster shook his head hurriedly, grief in his eyes. Marsh wasn't surprised to find she only had one surviving pup — it wasn't uncommon for the pups of a lone wolf to all die in the annual Hunts. Sometimes, the mother would even eat them herself...if she was desperate enough.

It was a split-second decision, and one he hoped he wouldn't regret later. "Come with me." He said, his voice softening slightly. "I'll keep you safe."

---

"Marsh?" He heard her whisper, bringing him back to reality. "Marsh it's me Allura...." He nodded slowly, his movements lethargic yet discernable as he communicated with her in the only way he knew how, with his voice being as unreliable as it was at the moment. "I brought you a rabbit.." His gaze once again flicked over to the small creature in question, realizing with her words that it was for him. He wasn't sure how he felt about the prospect of eating food at the moment — he felt vaguely sick — but he wouldn't dare waste food. Not right now, though. Right now, he knew, he needed to calm down and collect himself. The thought felt distant even in his own head.

"Marsh talk to me please..." Allura pleaded, and he was compelled by the desperation in her tone to try again, letting out a small croak that was likely too quiet for her to hear as she began singing. He found himself clinging to her voice, and he was able to ward away the next flashback by focusing on her song. It was beautiful, and not like anything he'd heard in the last four and a half years. Not like anything he'd heard in his lifetime.

He finally managed to croak out discernable words, although his voice was raspier than he would have liked. "Don't stop singing. Please." He sounded desperate but at this moment he didn't care, and over the next few minutes he slowly moved to lay down, too, trying to calm his heartbeat. He still kept his eyes on her, unable to bring himself to look away in fear of the danger...yet he was calming down, slowly but surely.

@teegan

[Deleted]

Allura looked at him as he asked her to keep singing, she nodded her eyes and continued to sing a sad yet loving song.it was all her favorite memories with her family tied into one song, one ball of emotions. She didn’t know many songs but this one was pure memories. Every word, every emotion was raw and brought pain to her heart. She was so glad it could do good for him but she still felt pain. She watched as he laid down and offer him a small smile as her song ended. She paused a bit and then smiled. A new song, their song. She began to sing about a lonely angry girl with no one. A meeting. The meeting of a crazy grumpy old man, She let their song draw out slowly as she closed her eyes. This was a song of their friendship. One she wouldn’t soon forget. She could feel his eyes on her, it wasn;t an uncomfortable feeling. But she definitely could feel it. It was a strange feeling for her, being watched. She hoped whatever had cause him to change was over now. She was so worried about him. It was another weird feeling for her. She wasn’t used to any of this, having friends, taking care of someone else. And worrying about them. She’d been on her own for a while and she couldn’t help it.

Karmatose

[Karmatose]

Marsh listened to her song, to the emotion behind it, although he didn't know what it was about. It sounded...painful, yet heartfelt. He found that trying to figure out what made her feel so much pain distracted him from his worries, and he let it. Slowly, his form began to relax and his hackles smoothened, his ears beginning to peel themselves from where they had been flattened against his head. When the song ended, panic began to bubble up inside him as his lifeline disappeared, but it wasn't long before she began a new song. This time, the song spoke of their friendship. Ten minutes ago, he wouldn't have dared to call it that. Now, though...He wasn't so sure he could call it anything else. He watched her, listened as she poured her heart into the music...and he felt compelled to join in.

So he did.

"Among the winter cries,
among the snow's lies,
there was a crimson stain,
where a pup had been slain."

"Mercy was not given,
to his grave, he was driven,
a hardened heart was left behind,
and to his life, he was declined."

"No mother, no father...
Save for a wolf who was more a bother,
His body lay unprotected,
his corpse uncollected."

"He had no ceremony,
Left for the vultures? If only!
He was ravaged by his kind,
and I could hear him as he whined."

"Every winter lives were lost,
lives like the pup whose name was Frost,
The Hunt is over now,
But I will not forget my vow."

As his own song came to an end, he realized how much information he had divulged about his past. He hoped she wouldn't question him about it, but somehow it felt...right. Like Frost was finally getting the elegy he deserved...

@teegan